Black Truth (A Twisted Fate Series Book 2) Page 7

  Without warning, I blurted, “Do you think I betrayed you? I feel like I did.”

  He stroked my cheek with his thumb. I closed my eyes to his soothing touch, but it was worrisome he hadn’t answered right away. I kept telling myself Gabe was entitled to his feelings.

  “Open your eyes, Willow. I want you to see mine when I answer you.”

  I opened them.

  “I don’t think you betrayed me. Not in the slightest. Alex is a different story. Words can’t express the amount of hate I feel for him.”

  It was hard to process family hating each other when I had a completely different experience. I leaned into his touch.

  “I’m in love with you, Willow. I have been since I first saw you.”

  Tears pooled in my eyes while his burned with honesty.

  “Don’t let that keep you from me. Please. The only time I’ve ever misled you was with Tack. And that was the last time. I’ll never give you a reason to doubt me again.”

  I touched the scruff on his face. I liked the coarse feeling against my skin and imagined it dragging across my sensitive breasts. Oh man, to have it across my nipples. Stop it, Willow. I need to keep a clear head through all this.

  “I know you’re thinking about us.”

  There was no denying it. “I am.” I cleared my throat ready to put my feelings out there. “I still love you, Gabe. I never stopped.”

  Those words felt right as I spoke them, but I was terrified. I had been here before and things had fallen apart not long after.

  A huge brilliant smile spread across his face. “Sweetheart, you have no idea how happy that makes me.”

  “But… I’m scared.”

  Please don’t let this be a repeat.

  He kissed my hand. “I’m scared, too. I’m afraid after wishing to have you back for so long this will all be a dream. But, I can promise you this, I will never lose you again. Never.”

  His words addressed my fear. But, it was still terrifying to allow love to take such control. “I hope so.”

  Gabe scooted closer. “Oh, baby, I promise. Just like I promised I’d come for you, I promise I will protect your love for me.”

  I lay down and stared up at the sky, letting his words penetrate my thoughts. “That’s all I want.”

  “Willow, I want to kiss you.”

  Turning, he was closer than I anticipated. The warmth of his breath brushed against my lips. “I would like that.”

  Without hesitation, Gabe pressed his lips to mine. It was sweet and familiar. I wanted more. Craved more. As I was about to open my mouth to let him in, he pulled back. “I don’t want to push my luck and rush you. Let’s take this slow. The wait will make it that much sweeter.”

  “Or drive us crazy.” I half laughed.

  He winked at me. “That, too.”

  Moving to his back, he motioned to me to move closer. “I can’t believe I didn’t recognize your touch when you kissed me as Tack.”

  “I had to be careful. It’s why I kept contact to a minimum. The accent kept you from making the connection.”

  It was amazing what our cognitive reasoning did to our thoughts. “You kept your familiar touch from me.”

  He wrapped his arm around me. “Yes. I had to change all that. I couldn’t stand not having you touch me, but I had to keep it controlled. It was so fucking hard. I want you to know that. I hated doing that to you.”

  The sincerity was overwhelming as he held me. I melted. “I know.” It was time to move past the deceit. “What would you think of Carson and Francesca as the godparents to our children?” My throat tightened, hoping that I had the chance to ask him.

  “I think that’s a wonderful idea.”

  “Me, too.”

  The words hung between us. There was a slight breeze and the warmth of his body was the perfect balance while I snuggled into his side. “Have you thought of any names?”

  “For the babies?”

  “Mmm.” The deep rumble in his chest was sexy.

  “I haven’t. Have you?” Honestly, I hadn’t. I was still working on getting used to being pregnant with twins.

  “No, but I have something I want to propose.”

  “What’s that?” The steady thud of his heart brought me closer to him, and I wrapped my arm around his middle.

  “We each have a boy and a girl name. We don’t tell the other. You name the first baby, I name the second one,” he answered.

  I raised my head and looked at Gabe. He watched me intently and gave me a loving look. This was to build strength between us. Not knowing what the other one picked, but trusting it was something we’d each like.

  I loved the idea and added, “No telling anyone. I don’t want it to slip.”

  “So you like the idea?”

  “Yes, I love it. It has a beautiful meaning behind it.”

  “I agree.” He trailed his hand down my back as we relaxed in perfect harmony.

  “When are you going to tell everyone about the twins? Was there a reason you didn’t tell Nonno tonight?”

  Laying back down, I pressed the palm of my hand to his heart and the tattoo of the swords crossing each other. “I don’t know why I didn’t say anything. I knew you left it up to me, but I wanted to wait.” It didn’t feel like the right time. It was unexplainable like it had been with how fast I trusted Tack in the beginning.

  “I’m fine with whatever you decide, sweetheart. For now, we’ll keep it between us.”

  Escaping for the evening was the perfect suggestion to rekindle our relationship.

  “Are you comfortable?” Gabe methodically rubbed my feet.

  “Mmm…”

  We were back at the hotel in our pajamas. Currently, I was being treated to a foot massage. It was amazing. I never wanted it to end. My eyes drifted close.

  There was a knock at the door

  “Shit.”

  Gabe’s curse brought a chuckle from me. I knew he wanted me to rest.

  “Let me see who it is.”

  “Okay.” My words were still sleepy as I stayed on the pillow.

  The door opened followed by whispering.

  “Willow, Francesca is here.”

  Sitting up, I saw Francesca standing in the doorway with a tub of ice cream. “Oh, I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking. I’ll come back later.”

  “No, please come in. I spy with my little eye some ice cream.”

  Francesca giggled. “You do.”

  Gabe gave me a wink. “I’m going to check in with Trent. You girls have fun.”

  I motioned for Francesca to come in as I called, “Oh, we will.”

  The apprehension left her face as she walked to the navy couch and handed me a spoon. “Do you like mint chocolate chip? I thought it might be nice to have some girl time.” Dark circles still rimmed her eyes.

  Unless Francesca brought Carson up, I wouldn’t. Maybe a little escape from reality like Gabe had provided me would help her.

  “I love it. Great choice.”

  She popped off the lid and we both dug into the ice cream. The minty flavor mixed with chocolate burst across my tongue.

  “This is amazing.” I almost moaned.

  She took a bite too. “I needed this. I wish I could be left in the dark until I know everything is okay.”

  “I understand.” Everyone needed something different to cope.

  We sat back, put our feet on the coffee table, and set the tub of ice cream between us.

  “How are you doing, Willow?”

  I took another bite. “I’m hanging in there. Things are progressing with Gabe.”

  “Ooh la la.” A giggle came from Francesca.

  I clarified. “We’re taking it slow. I mean obviously”—I gestured to my stomach—“we’ve raced through a few milestones, but I like the place we’re at.”

  Francesca’s hand came on top of mine. “I’m so glad. I can see how much Gabe loves you. I overheard him talking to Trent this morning in the hallway. He told him to do whatever it takes to kee
p you safe.”

  A tear left my eye and I wiped it away, moved by how Gabe kept proving he loved me. It’s all I ever wanted. “Sorry. I can’t seem to control the tears at times.”

  “Me, either. I feel like a leaky faucet most of the time.”

  We laughed. “Me, too. Plus my word vomit is atrocious.”

  “Word vomit? I don’t understand what that means.” She looked at me with a raised eyebrow. Even though Francesca spoke fluent English, sometimes she wasn’t able to follow slang.

  I took another bite. “It’s like my filter to my mouth has gone. This morning in the doctor’s office, I was thinking about how built Gabe was. More so than before he was deployed. I told him he was big and that I liked him big.”

  Francesca sputtered and laughed. “You did not.”

  “I so did. Then I continued the nightmare by telling the doctor I was not currently having sex with Gabe standing right there like I was a virgin.”

  Francesca dropped her spoon as she held her stomach and laughed. “I’m so glad I did not get word vomit. I’m becoming a carnivore. Red meat is all I can think about.”

  We put our spoons back in the ice cream. “Here’s to pregnancy.”

  “Morning.” I shuffled into the kitchen where Gabe stood at the stove, cooking. His low-slung lounge pants, messy hair, and T-shirt were not helping my thoughts stay on the straight and narrow.

  I will keep my mouth shut. I will keep my mouth shut.

  With expert skill, he flipped an omelet.

  I am so screwed.

  “Morning. How’d you sleep?” His deep voice was sexy as hell. Always had been.

  “Really well.” I motioned to the couch where blankets were strewn to the side. “You know you can sleep in the room Nonno was in. You would get a better night’s rest.”

  He sprinkled some cheese on the omelet before sliding it on a plate and pouring more egg batter into the pan. “I slept perfect, knowing you were okay. Unless it bothers you, I would prefer the couch.”

  Last night I had debated whether to call Gabe on my phone from my bedroom to hear him talk. When he had been Tack, there were many nights I wasn’t able to sleep. To help, he read to me, which chased away all the nightmares.

  “No, it’s fine.” He glanced over his shoulder and there was no missing his quick appreciative glance at my body.

  I was wearing silk shorts with a camisole. The appreciation brought delight to me.

  Gabe added some peppers to the pan as I came to stand beside him.

  “I feel bad you’re cooking all the time. I need to set my alarm to get up one morning and cook that bacon quiche you love.”

  He pressed a quick kiss to my cheek. “I like cooking breakfast for you. Grab your omelet before it gets cold. Mine will be done in a second.”

  As soon as I grabbed the plate, the smell of eggs hit me out of nowhere. It was raunchy and I gagged. Normally, I loved eggs, but this was foul and rank. It got worse as I tried to breathe through it. My stomach turned. This wasn’t going to end well. I knew what was coming as I dashed to the bathroom. The stench followed me as if it had permanently soaked into my skin.

  My cracker I’d eaten was lost as I heaved into the toilet.

  Morning sickness. I hated it. More heaving. It was as if I had food poisoning from the smell alone.

  Gabe kneeled beside me with a warm cloth as I flushed the toilet. There was a dull ache in my stomach after retching.

  “What triggered it this time?”

  I wiped my face and muttered, “Eggs.”

  “No more eggs. Check.”

  A small giggle escaped. “That’s probably wise to start a checklist.” I stood and tossed the cloth into the hamper. “I’m going to stay in here until we leave for the hospital. I don’t think I can stand smelling it again.”

  I gagged thinking about it and closed my eyes tight. Think about something else.

  “How about some crackers and ginger ale?”

  My stomach was raw, but I needed to eat something. The thought of either wasn’t causing any additional nausea. “Yeah, I’ll try it.”

  Gabe took off and I shut the door behind him to keep the smell out. I sniffed my clothes and swore there was a faint egg aroma.

  I’m going to be sick. Oh my gosh!

  It was like I had some sort of super sniffer. I gagged again. Hurriedly, I stripped off my pajamas and threw them into the hamper like they were toxic.

  “Here you go. A plate of crackers and—”

  I spun around. Naked. I felt the heat creep over my skin.

  Gabe took me in, swallowed hard, and tried to look at my face, but his eyes kept drifting down. My arms instinctively covered my breasts.

  His face remained blank. “Willow… we… I… the doctor said no sex right now.”

  Kill. Me. Now. Apparently my body was taking over since I had put my mouth on lockdown.

  This had to be explained. “I… uhh… I was changing. I smelled eggs on my clothes and stripped. I wasn’t asking for sex. No sex!” My sentence ended on a near squeal. My word vomit wasn’t over yet. Of course not. “I don’t mean no sex ever. I love sex with you.” My hands flew to my mouth. “Why can’t I stop?” I muttered. Pregnancy was stripping every ounce of dignity I had left as my hormones took over.

  Gabe set the plate and drink down.

  Would I still be sexy even pregnant?

  Reemerging, Gabe held a white terry cloth robe out and helped me put it on. “For my sanity, let’s get you covered.”

  Tears pricked my eyes. His sanity? Was I that horrid looking already? What was wrong with me? Word vomit, tears, horniness… all in the last two minutes.

  Averting my eyes, I tightened the sash on my robe. “Thank you. I wasn’t thinking when I tried to get away from the egg smell and stripped down.”

  A finger came underneath my chin raising my gaze. “You have nothing to be ashamed of. Hell, Willow, I want you so bad. If I thought I could control myself, I’d want you naked all the time. But we can’t. The doctor said not for a week. And I don’t think we’re ready for that step. But, I want nothing more than to make love to you while you are pregnant with my children. Every. Single. Day.”

  “You don’t think I’m hideous?” A tear slipped free and then the dam burst and I cried. I wasn’t showing, but I felt off.

  Gabe wrapped his arms around me.

  “I’m a mess. I’ve never been this emotional.”

  “You’re pregnant, sweetheart. It’s messing with your hormones.” I felt his lips press against the top of my head. “You’re perfect. All I ever want is you. I love you.”

  “Love you, too.”

  I wrapped my arms around his waist, loving the muscular feel. Oh, how I’d missed Gabe all these months. He caressed my back and the soothing motion calmed me.

  “I’m trying to keep my distance physically from you.”

  “Why?” I knew the answer was obvious, but I needed to hear his thoughts.

  The depth of his stare penetrated my soul. “Because, I need to know you want to be with me and not because of the chemistry.”

  My heart clenched at the pain in his words. This was the effects of his childhood. Plus, I had been all over the place emotionally and giving mixed signals. I wanted him, then I was scared or aggravated. Mentally, I told myself I needed to decide fully. Right now, I had only one foot on the path and one foot off, which wasn’t fair to any of us including our unborn children.

  I squeezed him tighter. “We’re both holding back.”

  “We’ll get there.”

  And I knew we would.

  Guiding me to the bed, Gabe placed the crackers and ginger ale before me. Thankfully, there was no smell associated with either.

  “Here, eat some of this.”

  Mercifully, I took a small bit of the cracker. “Thanks. I may dub this the breakfast of champions.”

  He chuckled. “If it keeps you from getting sick, it’ll earn that title. Hopefully, this subsides after the first trimester.�
� How much had Gabe read on pregnancy? I’d read quite a bit since I found out. From Gabe’s comments, he had been reading as much as I had.

  “After we stop to see Carson, I was wondering if we could run home. Just for a bit, not to stay the night.”

  Gabe touched my leg, and I felt the familiar warmth that was like a drug. His fingers retracted and I stilled his hand.

  “Please don’t. I want your touch.” I wanted to put both feet on the path. Yes, it was terrifying, but all the same, love was worth the risk.

  The heat from his hand returned. “Trent stopped by. Marie and Bennett want us there to meet with the doctors this morning regarding Carson.”

  The cracker dropped on my plate. “Wait. Why? Is there something wrong?”

  “Not that I know of. Don’t stress. If Dr. Byrum sees you, he may bring you back to the hospital.”

  I took a deep breath, picked up my cracker, and took a small bite. “Do you think it’s an update?”

  “It could be. I suspect they’re going to update the options.”

  Options. There was only one option I wanted, which was to bring Carson back. What other options were there? Take him off life support before he was ready? Absolutely not. Thank goodness Bennett and Marie were levelheaded, and I wouldn’t have to worry about them doing something radical.

  A few days ago, the doctors indicated Carson wasn’t strong enough to breathe on his own yet. Had something changed? Was it for the worse? Better? I hated vague meetings with doctors. It was much better to get right to the point.

  Gabe’s fingers on my cheek brought me out of my spiraling thoughts. “Let’s wait to worry until we hear from the doctors. All we can do is focus on the facts.”

  He was right.

  “How’s Francesca?” I asked, worried about her. Now, I was even more grateful we had spent time together last night. We had laughed and left all of the worries from our lives behind. Time had flown until eleven when we simultaneously yawned. Two pregnant women staying up that late was a miracle with how much sleep we now required. It had been worth it.

  “They aren’t mentioning this to her until we get there due to the stress. Bennett and Marie are worried.”